How to Bear the Unbearable

At one time or another, most of us will feel overwhelmed by the burdens we bear. As though our grief is a river swelling within, threatening to drown us in anger and hurt. In such moments, the pain may feel unbearable, and we might fear being broken by the sheer magnitude and mass of it. We may also feel alone, as the anguish we're enduring separates us from others, who all seem to oddly be going about life as though everything were fine. Grief can be so isolating. Which is why it's so helpful to remember in such times that…

Whatever you're experiencing

has been felt before by countless

others. In fact, it's also being

felt, in this very moment,

by millions of others

around the world.

When we're able to open our field up, and imagine holding this very human experience of big anger, big heartache, big despair along with millions of others, it becomes ever so slightly more bearable. When we can allow our hearts to have compassion for those millions of people suffering as we are in this moment, we begin to transform. Our humanity deepens, our souls soften and we suddenly begin to make sense of what the poets have been saying since time began.

That we're fragile.

And the only thing we can count on is change,

which often comes suddenly & without warning.

That life is precious.

That our only safety lies

in the goodness of one another.

Grief holds gifts.

Opening to the vulnerability of your humanity is one of them. You're not alone in feeling so alone. When grief threatens to take down your house, invite it into your heart with a deep welcoming breath. On the exhale, breathe out a blessing for yourself and all others suffering in this very moment with this horrible feeling of unspeakable sorrow. Katherine Woodward Thomas, MA, MFT, will be teaching From Heartache to Wholeness with David Kessler and Paul Denniston, RYT 500, on May 18 – 20, 2018, at 1440 Multiversity Katherine Woodward Thomas, MA, MFT, is the author of the New York Times best seller Conscious Uncoupling: 5 Steps to Living Happily Even After and the national best seller, Calling in "The One": 7 Weeks to Attract the Love of Your Life. She is a licensed marriage and family therapist and teacher to thousands around the world in her virtual and in-person learning communities.